Thursday, December 20, 2012

Doomsday Eve

Just wanted to take a second to wish everybody a happy Doomsday Eve. I wasn't gonna take part in the quackery until I realized that this was probably the last Doomsday of our lives, so I figured Id mark the occasion to be a part of the historical record. The next Doomsday isn't scheduled until like 3797 or something and try as I might, I dont think Im gonna make it that long to see it.
So heres to our/my last ever Doomsday!! Cheers!!! BOOYA!! Blah!

Now, logically I know the world isn't gonna end today or tomorrow, or even within the next ten, twenty years. There isn't a space object big enough or close enough to cause us any problems any time soon; any solar flare dangerous enough to bring society down tomorrow would have to have left the sun yesterday; no disease, no matter how new, potent, or contagious, would ever have enough time to kill a billion people (never mind 7 billion people ) in a day or even a week; the third anti-Christ  hasn't shown yet; no terrorist organization, no matter how big or sophisticated, has a weapon deadly enough; and even if every natural disaster on the planet hit us all at once, there would still be enough of the population left to maintain society.

So, sorry to all you hopeful cultists out there, but unless a mothership comes out of nowhere to suck you up or a rogue star made of dark matter suddenly appears (shhh), you're gonna wake up Dec 22nd just like you've done every other day...unless you've committed suicide already. Eh.

But in case I'm wrong and the world does end, I would like to confess that I---(end tape)

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